IBB poll: Would you buy this candle?

If you’re not familiar with Heretic Parfums, you should be. This clean, niche brand has proven to be a disrupter in the fragrance space by giving traditional (naturally derived) perfume notes a decidedly edgy spin—and this “house” was also the first to launch a CBD-infused scent which is aptly named Dirty Grass.

Heretic’s latest candle offering is just about the last thing I ever expected to see in my email inbox—and I have mixed emotions about it. See for yourself…

I completely understand the subversive point Heretic is trying to make here. In a world where we are made to feel that our vaginas require cleansing, grooming and scenting to the point they no longer resemble their natural state, Heretic’s “vagina” has a sweet, zesty aroma that includes notes of lemon, pepper, bergamot, geranium, clove, rose, black currant and apricot.

And wouldn’t you know, “This Smells Like My Vagina” sold out within the one week that elapsed between getting the heads-up about its debut and writing this (with no indication that it will be restocked). Scent aside (which I’m sure is divine), I could imagine gifting this to one of my friends who is totally no-holds-barred when it comes to talking about any goings-on down there, but there’s a high probability of inappropriate candle placement. For instance, I’d never put this on my desk in my home office since I have a peri-pubescent 11-year-old son who gets weirded out when he sees one of my bras. And if you work in a less-than-progressive “real” office setting, this is sure to elicit a reaction from HR.

But with all of this said, I kind of wish I had ordered one when I had the chance. It would have been perfect for my closet since me and my vagina are the only ones who ever go in there.