A few of my COVID beauty blunders
As another week of being home 99% of the time comes to an end, I figured I’d wrap it up on a light note—in the form of sharing a few of my What was I thinking? beauty moments from the last few months (or at least the ones I can remember). It goes without saying that all of us have been a little off-kilter in some way or another since March—which is to be expected—but at least I’m able to laugh about a few of my miscalculations along the way.
First, let’s just acknowledge that we were ALL freaking out about our hair when salons were shut down. (Beauty parlors opened down here in Florida back in early May, and we all know how this and other restriction-lifts panned out.) Before then, I literally begged my colorist to come to my house to do my hair outside (without success). At the height of my desperation, I called her to ask her if I could use a temporary color like Splat—because hot pink or purple hair seemed like a perfectly viable alternative to two-inch dark brown roots. I figured, why not have a little fun when I’m literally locked in the house? As it turns out, this would have ended in one of two ways: The temporary color would have literally fallen off my hair within a few days (and onto my clothes and white bedding) or it would have not washed out of my blonde (which would require some major corrective color). That’s all I needed to hear and I never entertained that thought again.
Can we also acknowledge that perhaps we’ve been drinking a bit (or a lot) more than we did before the pandemic? The early days of the Q were the only time since college when it was perfectly acceptable to open a bottle of wine before noon. Drunk online shopping would occasionally ensue, and one day I came across (what seemed to be) the holy-grail cracked-heel solution I’ve been searching for my entire life. Part motorized foot file and part vacuum to contain the dust (yes, ANOTHER product that involves suction—I may need an intervention), I ran to the mailbox every day waiting for it to arrive. But when it did, it was more of a disappointment than Sex and the City 2 and it went promptly into the trash.
My third and final beauty blunder (at least for this installment) was fake nails. One day, I actually decided that long, Kardashian-esque tips were a good idea—but I at least had the sense to buy cheap ones on Amazon (first) before committing to a more expensive customized set (later). I chose a white to light pink ombre (because subtle, WTF?), completely ignoring the fact that when I’m not typing, I’m cooking or cleaning—convinced that inch-long talons wouldn’t interfere AT ALL. Needless to say, the only reason I opened the package when they arrived was to insert the RMA slip for the return.
So there you have it… I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend filled with wise beauty decisions! (And feel free to share your self-care snafus!)
